It’s about what you can take

In the last few weeks and month, life has tested me. It punched me, played me and kicked me, as I already was down. I can honestly say, in the last couple of weeks, life was a bitch. A bully.

My dream always was and always will be, to become an author. To make a living from my books. To be that kind of author, that writes amazing storys. Taking my readers to journeys, they’ll never forget. And all my life, I do nothing about it, but dreaming.

Until this year. Everything changed this year. I grew stronger. I found love and I lost it. I got hurt. I struggled. But I also fight back.
I recovered from a broken heart. I recovered from failure after failure.
And as I thought this was it, that I’m through with the failure and finally can harvest what I’ve sowed earlier this year – life kicks me even harder. I can’t remember a time in my life, where nearly everything goes wrong. And I mean everything.
Every step toward my dream I made, was cursed. With every ladder I’d climbed, to reach the next step, I instantly got punched in the face. Wrong templates, a broken laptop, delivery issues with the next one, pricing problems – no matter how hard I worked, the punches kept coming.

To create, end, and upload this book was the hardest thing I’d ever done.
I’d expected it to be hard. But I’d expected it more to be coming from myself.
I thought, that I’d maybe fear the first readers. That I’ll fail to promote it or get really bad reviews, because I blew it. But that didn’t happen (well, until now).
What happend was, that life hits me. Again and again. I’d hardly had time to breathe after solving a problem, because the next one arrived, as soon as the first problem was gone.

And I don’t wanted to go any further, I’d tell that my friends a dozen of times. I tell it myself. I don’t want to do this anymore. But I did.

And now, this book is online. I did it. I wrote a novel. I uploaded it. And now it’s ready to sell. My first novel is online. Seeing this, is a dream coming true. All this failure, all these struggles, the loss, the problems, the fight I had to face … all this couldn’t stop me.

I’m exhausted. I’m tired. And all I want to do, is going to sleep and do nothing for at least a week. But no matter how tired I am, I’m smiling. Because I did it, against all odds. And nobody, not even life, can take this away from me.

I want to share what I’ve learned through this journey:

  1. Life will test you. The more you want something, the harder it will be to get it.
  2. When you think it’s over, life just gets started.
  3. You will want to give up.
  4. Don’t.
  5. The more you want to give in, the harder you have to push forward.
  6. You need friends, that are strong enough to hold you in the game.

Don’t cry for yourself. Don’t blame life or other people, because times get rough. Concentrate on how to solve the upcoming problems, one after another. Cry, panic,  become angry – that’s okay. But never ever give up.

Think about it: This is your dream. The one thing you wanted to accomplish since forever. When it could be done in an instant without any struggle, you would have done this years ago. But it isn’t and deep down inside, you know this. That’s the reason you didn’t start earlier.

But you aren’t the person you’ve been years ago. You’re older. Stronger. More brave. You can do this now. You can look fear in the eye and see your dream right behind it. Call it life, call it inner demons, call it haters – someone will always try to get in your way. It’s your job, to not let them.

You can do this.

The mind is the limit.



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